Creativity is King

I love Halloween. Not for the candy. Not for the parties. I love Halloween for the feeling that for one night, you can be someone or someth–

Just kidding.

I love it for the slutty costumes girls wear.

And to a slightly lesser degree, I love the putting together and wearing of interesting/hilarious/all-around awesome costumes for everyone (not just the ladies).

So, with a hope I could somehow turn this into a recurring feature (i.e. Do’s and Don’ts: Cooking a Thanksgiving Turkey), I have put together a list of the things to do and things not to do when it comes to a Halloween costume.

-Don’t be the Joker (word to last night’s “Office”).

Yeah, it’s an awesome character. Yeah, he wears an interesting costume. No, you don’t have any creativity since everyone and their brother is gonna be this from now until kingdom come.

-Don’t try to be offensively funny with a retarded costume.

It’s not funny. It’s just stupid.

-Make the damn thing yourself.

Now that’s impressive. Store bought costumes are incredibly lame.

-Don’t pick a costume because you think you will look cooler than you regularly do while wearing it.

(In the interest of full disclosure, my costume this year is 1985 Marty McFly as well. I’ve always wanted to do it, but never found a red vest that was good enough until this year. Unlike the tool above, however, I’m fully prepared to look like a 1980s jackass, and not like I just gelled my hair and I’m ready to hit the clubs.) Halloween is the ONE night of the year where you just need to abandon all hopes of getting some (unless you’re just incredibly awesome). There are two things you should be focused on October 31st: 1) Having a sweet costume. 2) Getting hammered.

-If you are a female, DO pick a costume than involves cleavage.

-Along those same lines…if you are a male, there’s nothing wrong with wearing something ridiculous.

Ridiculous and awkward is funny, and anyone who dresses up as Terry would command my undying respect.

-Couples costumes are SO lame.

-If you have a small child who doesn’t know any better, dress said small child in something awesome.

Here’s the deal: no matter what, someone has already had the idea for your costume, no matter what it is, and they probably pulled it off way better than you. However, that’s no reason you shouldn’t put forth some effort.

And then get bombed.